HERMOSA BEACH, Calif. — They referred to as her Susie, and for seven weeks, Susie, a 27-year-old American working a farm in rural Sicily, lived a life that Zana Muno had lengthy dreamed of.
She’d be on a bus by 8 within the morning, piling in with 13 others from across the globe, starting from 70-year-old ladies from Sweden to friends her age from Germany and in every single place and each demographic between, and off they’d go, generally to the farm, generally on a area journey. There can be a lesson, espresso and cake at 10, lunch prep adopted by, in fact, “essentially the most unbelievable lunch,” Zana stated, one other lesson, and the bus journey again.
The one semblance of her former life as knowledgeable seashore volleyball participant can be a carry or hill sprints on the land of her host household earlier than she’d return to the brand new: A house-cooked Italian dinner and a two or three-hour dialog together with her host dad and mom. They “didn’t communicate a lick of English” Muno stated, and she or he didn’t communicate a lick of Italian so that they’d chat over Google translate till she couldn’t struggle sleep any longer.
“That was each day,” she stated on SANDCAST: Seashore Volleyball with Tri Bourne and Travis Mewhirter. “It’s one thing I’ll always remember.”
For practically two months, that was Zana Muno’s life. Throughout these two months, she did every part she had sought to do, every part she had designed for her life, save for one relatively notable exception: play volleyball.
No person in Italy requested her about volleyball.
“They didn’t even know what a volleyball was,” she stated. And for the primary three weeks, gosh was that a stupendous factor. The load of a mercurial 2023 season, the very weight that pushed her to spontaneously ship in an software for this system with out a lot thought, started to carry.
“I used to be so burnt,” Muno stated. “Bodily, mentally, emotionally, I’d by no means been in a spot like that.”
It wasn’t that Muno’s season was unhealthy. Not by most requirements, anyway. It’s troublesome to label a season a nasty one when a semifinal run on the Manhattan Seashore Open is made. Nevertheless it was considerably directionless. A partnership with Kerri Walsh Jennings was placed on indefinite maintain as Walsh Jennings recovered from a foot harm. It left Muno in a wierd limbo, taking part in largely with Deahna Kraft — however that will solely be till Walsh Jennings returned. She by no means did, which left Muno idling, taking part in with whomever was obtainable whereas understandably holding out for the best participant of all time to come back again to the sand.
“She’s the objective,” Muno stated of Walsh Jennings. “You possibly can’t do higher. Any time together with her, to me, felt very priceless.”
So she popped round, defending for Jessica Gaffney in Mexico, split-blocking with Carly Kan in New Orleans, defending for Allie Wheeler in Brazil, defending for Kraft in various tournaments, splitting with Savvy Simo in Chicago and Carli Lloyd in Laguna.
Typically it was enjoyable, taking part in with new folks, folks she liked, exploring totally different sides and positions. A lot of the time it was troublesome, sacrificing the event of a bona fide group for a wierd aimlessness as her friends started making runs on the Olympic Video games, AVP titles, leaping up the rankings.
After ending final in Chicago, Muno was scrolling via TikTok, coming throughout a video of a lady at a farming program in rural Sicily. The familiarity struck her: Maddy Klineman, youthful sister of Alix Klineman, had enrolled in the identical program years in the past.
“She would publish these little snippets and I used to be like ‘No matter you’re doing, I must go,’ ” Muno stated. On the time, Maddy was a senior at UCLA, Muno a freshman. Muno requested every part there was to ask about this system, figuring out that journey to be her new “lifelong dream.”
“I at all times thought each time I used to be performed volleyball, after children, I’m going to this program,” Muno stated. After which, in that hole area after dropping consecutive matches and ending lifeless final within the remaining AVP of the season, she noticed the movies on TikTok. She discovered the web site, learn the way to apply, didn’t hesitate.
“I figured I’d apply, I received’t get in,” Muno stated. She even missed the appliance deadline, atoning for it with a pleading electronic mail that learn one thing official-sounding like “please please please please,” Muno stated, laughing.
Her household and buddies, no stranger to the impulsive nature of Zana Muno, requested if this was such a fantastic thought. At 27, she was getting into her athletic prime. She was nonetheless probably the greatest defenders in the USA. Disappointing outcomes apart, she had an exquisite life in Hermosa Seashore.
Was this actually such a good suggestion?
“I do know I can’t be the particular person or participant I wish to be if I proceed on this route,” Muno advised them. “I’m not taking part in nicely, I’m not completely satisfied, I’m very not completely satisfied, it’s popping out in my efficiency. If I carry on this path, I would like one thing to alter. Why not go large?”
“I used to be actually seeking to discover myself not simply as a volleyball participant as a result of I at all times recognized myself as Zana the Volleyball Participant,” Muno continued. “I used to be like ‘What else can Zana be?’ ”
In Italy, Zana the Volleyball Participant was an afterthought.
Enter Susie the Farmer.
“Once I received there I couldn’t care much less about volleyball,” she stated.
What Susie cared about was seeds and their fascinating historical past. Culinary work. Consuming seasonally. Working together with her arms. Making an attempt — and failing — to take advantage of a goat. Butchering animals that will be on her plate an hour or two later. Assembly people with tales as deep and wealthy as any of the athletes Muno had lengthy admired, tales that wouldn’t get shared on ESPN or NBC, tales that have been solely handed alongside throughout bus rides via rural Sicily or over dinners late into the night time over Google translate.
“It was actually eye opening,” Muno stated. “I’ve at all times idolized Kobe Bryant, Tiger [Woods], all these sports activities heroes, however there’s so many unbelievable folks doing different unbelievable issues on the market. It didn’t take away from my love for volleyball however it opened my eyes a lot.”
It opened her eyes, primarily, to what’s actual, the tangible features of life that may be felt and tasted and smelled. Since her debut on the AVP Tour in 2019, Muno has cultivated one of many largest followings in skilled seashore volleyball. There are 115,000-plus individuals who comply with her on Instagram, which suggests 115,000-plus opinions about what she wears, how she seems in a bikini, how she performs on the courtroom, how she speaks, even how she phrases her captions. Virtually with out her noticing, Muno started to curate her real-life persona across the one she was crafting on-line, not the opposite method round.
“The largest factor I’ve discovered after I’ve been gone is who the F cares?” she stated. “I used to be so anxious about posting the fitting factor and the fitting caption and being the fitting individual that I began altering who I really was. It’s actually terrifying. Who is that this individual that I’ve curated as a result of I really feel like that’s what I’m imagined to be doing?”
Her friends in Sicily observed. They noticed the Zana Muno on Instagram and in contrast her to the Susie the Farmer, figuring out the sizable disparity between the 2.
“Anyone there stated you’re not like you might be on Instagram, you’re actually goofy, you’re so goofy,” Muno stated. “And that’s who I’m. It was a extremely particular expertise.”
It was additionally a contact terrifying.
Midway via this system, the Seashore Professional Tour Finals have been being held in Doha, Qatar. They have been streamed wherever with a tool, which included Muno’s, even when she would go 10 hours a day with out cell service. Watching the perfect on the earth making a dwelling play a sport at which she’s fairly gifted, whereas she was off on a farm was a trigger for no small quantity of tension and second-guessing.
What was she doing?
Had she simply torpedoed her profession on an impulse?
“I had an existential disaster a little bit bit, why am I right here, I’m going to be so behind, had a full meltdown,” Muno stated. “It was an enormous threat I suppose and I do know I’m going to take a step again on this profession I’ve been doing for therefore lengthy. On reflection I feel it’ll be completely value it.”
She knew whereas she was nonetheless there, too. She’d stalk social media and numerous web sites, sleuthing for partnership updates. Then she’d be on the bus, off cell service, ingesting within the wild and rural air, hanging out with sheep.
“Yeah,” she’d suppose on these rolling hills in Italy, “this was a good suggestion.”
Placing apart all that she discovered about farming and agriculture and meals, to not point out the relationships she fashioned and the indelible experiences made, the straightforward realizing how a lot she missed the sport was sufficient to make all of it value it. For her complete life, Muno hasn’t gone lengthy with out touching a volleyball. It wasn’t the identical with out it, even whereas she was dwelling a special model of her life she’d lengthy sought.
“Moderately rapidly I spotted I missed it, for a lot of causes, too,” she stated. “The truth hit me that I nonetheless love taking part in volleyball, it’s simply that the hoopla of seashore volleyball is exhausting.”
Now the hoopla will take a again seat in her reorganized hierarchy of volleyball wants, so to talk. Possibly she’ll play on the Seashore Professional Tour. Possibly not. Possibly she’ll chase some large, intimidating, far-out objective. Possibly not. That’s the hoopla — the factors sport, the associate shuffles, the stress of without end reaching.
What’s actual? Being on the seashore, each day, doing one thing for which she has a rediscovered ardour.
“Being gone I simply have a lot gratitude for doing this as a job and doing one thing I really like. Being round individuals who did what they liked and have been so completely satisfied, and later in life and so proud and grateful to share it with me,” she stated. “Simply gratitude for getting to make use of my physique each day. I spotted how a lot I worth my physique and feeling a sure method. Even practices I missed a lot. I really like the monotony of going out and getting reps and dealing on my thoughts and all of these various things.
“I took a sabbatical, and I’m not saying everybody ought to do it however for me it was actually good, I’m actually pleased with my alternative.”